Before I get started let me make something clear. Everyone and their brother has made a list of which movies they think are the worst ever. Some of these lists are actually very well done, so instead of just creating another, I have gone to the heart of one of the problems. One of the reasons some movies are so bad is because their original ideas were horrible to begin with. Thus I have put together my list of those bad movie ideas. I avoided putting films on the list that had good ideas to begin with (maybe), but ended up being bad movies for one reason or another (usually writing, directing and acting). Films like Parting Shots, about a guy who’s about to die so he plans on killing everyone that ever wronged him, could have been good as a comedy or maybe a straight action film, or VanHelsing, which had great potential as an idea, I mean come on, a monster/vampire slayer; or even that wonderful Vegas movie Showgirls, that I actually kind of liked for some reason, oh yeah Gina Gershon, in skimpy clothes, that’d be it. I also purposely avoided obviously crappy movies like Sci-Fi Network messes, such as Sharktapus, or just plain stupid films like Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. The following are simply a list of the poorest excuses for movie themes ever imaginable, see if you agree.
#8 – G.I. Joe (2009)
Director: Stephen Sommers
When I was younger one of my absolute favorite things to do was to play with my G.I. Joe action figures. Back then they were around 8″ high and came with uniforms to dress them in and props. The G.I. Joe figures became the ultimate military toy, and were popular because they didn’t come with any real background story, preferring to allow the child to create one. The bad idea came first when some moron decided to create a cartoon series and made G.I. Joe a team and COBRA their enemy. It died after a while, just as it should, so tell me why someone had to make a film with that same ridiculous premise, I mean just leave the toy a toy.